Britney’s “Work Bitch” Video is Exact Perfection


The premiere of “Work Bitch” came at the perfect time in my life. Isn’t that just how Britney does it? I am getting married in 2 months (!) and I have fallen off the working out train. This was due to many reasons including the rash from HELL that was spread by overheating. Maybe one day I will share that story with you. If there is any time in my life I need to be reminded to work, it is now. As Britney says,

You want a hot body? You want a Bugatti?
You want a Maserati? You better work bitch
You want a Lamborghini? Sip martinis?
Look hot in a bikini? You better work bitch

YAnnotateou wanna live fancy? Live in a big mansion?
Party in France?
You better work bitch, you better work bitch

It is nice to be reminded that that shit takes WORK. I do want a hot body! I want to look hot in a bikini [honeymoon in Cancun]! I want to live fancy! So, I gotta get to work, bitch.

Of course, the video is just mind-blowing and amazing in the way only Britney can pull off. It makes no sense at all. She is dancing in the desert, in a pool of hammerhead sharks, being pulled around by women dressed as S&M cats, exploding manikin heads … just perfection.

Thank you, Britney, for reminding me I gotta work hard, like it’s my profession.

love, Sarah

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What to Eat BEFORE & AFTER a Workout


BeforeAfterWorkout

I have recently been doing a new workout routine. I am not ready to unveil it just yet because I want to make sure I love it before I tell you all about it. I was a little too quick to write about the Britney Spears + Jessica Alba Workout Routine. I fucking hate this routine. It made me dread the gym and was so long.  I guess not all things are DIY. Ek!

One things I am confident about sharing is what to eat before you workout and what to eat after. My friend John [who helped me create the new routine] is an Olympian in the 100 meter dash. He actually is a champion wheelchair racer and was once the best in the USA!

USA

So with great confidence I can tell you: before you workout have a banana. John said it will make you less sore because a lack a potassium amplified sore muscles.  I also found on this Men’s Health article a great explanation:

“They’re nature’s PowerBar,” boasts Dr. Louise Burke, head of Sports Nutrition at the Australian Institute of Sport and coauthor of The Complete Guide to Food for Sports Performance: Peak Nutrition for Your Sport. Bananas are loaded with digestible carbohydrates (read: fuel) and are packed with potassium, which aids in maintaining nerve and muscle function. The body doesn’t store potassium for very long, so a medium banana before a workout will help keep nutrient levels high. Villacorta especially recommends bananas for morning exercisers: “Get up and eat a medium banana with 1/2 cup of Greek yogurt. Wait about 30 minutes and then hit the gym. Your body will need the carbohydrates and protein.”

After the gym you should be drink chocolate milk. I know this sounds disgusting, but it works! John says after a workout you lose glycogen. What is glycogen? Science Daily says, in a matter of words, that humans and animals store glycogen energy in their muscles and liver. Chocolate milk helps replace glycogen and results in a fast recovery. Don’t believe me? UTexas even says so. So ha!

Word of advice from personal experience, don’t workout on an empty stomach!

love, Sarah

Britney Spears Wednesday – Slave for You Body Motivation


Ladies, if you ever need work-out motivation simply watch Britney’s “Slave for You” music video. This might be the hottest little video of all time! Whenever I watch it, I am just memorized by her abs, her pretty face, and how good she looks all sweaty!

This video is guaranteed to get you In the Zone at the gym, with workout videos, or when road running! Yes, I just made a Britney Spears pun.

Yeah… saying no to work-out apps


iFitnessLarge

Screw you workout apps!

When I created the Britney Spears + Jessica Alba Work Out Routine I was determined to use an app to track my progress and reps.  After doing this work out a few times — honestly, less than I am proud to admit — I have sworn off work-out apps! I was using Gym Geek, but found it wasted SO MUCH of my previous gym time trying to record the information. I would run on the treadmill and then have to spend a whole minute logging the information. I know a minute does not seem like a lot of time, but for all the different exercises it really does add about 20 minutes to the work-out. And let’s be truthful here — I have a hard enough time getting my ass to the gym, I don’t need to spend the next an extra 20 minutes calculating my reps.

As an alternative I decided to try my iPhone Notes. Yep, that free little notebook that comes with your iPhone and uses that awful Comic Sans font on fake yellow lined paper. To my amazement, I love it! Sometimes easy is the best way.

photo

Use iPhone Notes to track work-outs

My advice, screw all those work out apps and just keep it simple. I do still love Ab Workout App!

Since I now have a wedding dress to look good in, look forward to more DIY work-out tips and tricks. I don’t want to end up like this guy!

giphy

love, Sarah

The Jessica Alba + Britney Spears Work Out Routine


Britney Jessica BodI would like to preface this post with the obvious fact that I am in no way a personal trainer and I have compiled a new workout based on research of less than scholarly blogs.

Along with being awful at waking up in the morning, I am also awful at motivating myself to work out.  I have always been incredibly thin — to an awkward point… my boyfriend almost peed his pants when he found a picture of me from 7th grade because I was so tall and skinny. Yet, at the ripe age of 26, I am finding myself at that stage where I need to work out to not diet.  This must be a sign of more fun things to come. Thus, it is time to motivate myself by reaching within and idolizing celebrity bodies! So the Jessica Alba + Britney Spears Workout Routine was born from the ashes of my procrastination and day dreaming.

The Jessica Alba + Britney Spears Workout Routine

Day 1 – ARMS

Treadmill Cardio
10 minutes total [2 min walking fast (speed 4.0) / 6 min running (speed 6.0) / 2 min walking fast (speed 4.0)]

Strength Training Arms
Shoulder Press Machine [3 sets at 20 reps each]
Bicep Curl Machine [3 sets at 20 reps each]
Lap Pull Downs [3 sets at 20 reps each]

Abs
Bosu Ball Crunches [50 reps]
Bosu Ball Plank with Knee Raises [50 reps]
Bicycle Crunches [50 reps]

Treadmill Cardio
10 minutes total [2 min walking fast (speed 4.0) / 8 min running (speed 6.0)]

Strength Training Arms
Shoulder Press Machine [3 sets at 20 reps each]
Tricep Extension Machine [3 sets at 20 reps each]
Lap Pull Downs [3 sets at 20 reps each]

Abs
Bosu Ball Crunches [50 reps]
Bosu Ball Plank with Knee Raises [50 reps]
Bicycle Crunches [50 reps]

Stretch Sun Salutations Yoga [I usually do 2 songs for timing]

Abs
Bosu Ball Crunches [50 reps]
Bosu Ball Plank with Knee Raises [50 reps]
Bicycle Crunches [50 reps]

Day 2 – LEGS

Treadmill Cardio
10 minutes total [2 min walking fast (speed 4.0) / 6 min running (speed 6.0) / 2 min walking fast (speed 4.0)]

Strength Training Legs
Seated Calf Raises [3 sets at 20 reps each]
Leg Press Machine [3 sets at 20 reps each]
Lunges with Dumbbell [3 sets at 20 reps each]

Abs Bosu
Ball Crunches [50 reps]
Bosu Ball Plank with Knee Pulls [50 reps]
Bicycle Crunches [50 reps]

Treadmill Cardio
10 minutes total [2 min walking fast (speed 4.0) / 8 min running (speed 6.0)]

Strength Training Legs
Seated Calf Raises [3 sets at 20 reps each]
Leg Press Machine [3 sets at 20 reps each]
Lunges with Dumbbell [3 sets at 20 reps each]

Abs
Bosu Ball Crunches [50 reps]
Bosu Ball Plank with Knee Raises [50 reps]
Bicycle Crunches [50 reps]

Stretch Sun Salutations Yoga [I usually do 2 songs for timing]

Abs
Bosu Ball Crunches [50 reps]
Bosu Ball Plank with Knee Raises [50 reps]
Bicycle Crunches [50 reps]

Day 3 – BACK

StairMaster Cardio
10 minutes total [2 min slow / 6 min fast / 2 min slow]

Strength Training Back
Superman (Pilates) [3 sets at 20 reps each]
Back Extensions (add weight if you want) [3 sets at 20 reps each]
Cable Seated Row [3 sets at 20 reps each]

Abs
Bosu Ball Crunches [50 reps]
Bosu Ball Plank with Knee Rises [50 reps]
Bicycle Crunches [50 reps]

StairMasterCardio
10 minutes total [2 min slow / 8 min fast]

Strength Training Back
Superman (Pilates) [3 sets at 20 reps each]
Back Extensions (add weight if you want) [3 sets at 20 reps each]
Cable Seated Row [3 sets at 20 reps each]

Abs
Bosu Ball Crunches [50 reps]
Bosu Ball Plank with Knee Raises [50 reps]
Bicycle Crunches [50 reps]

Stretch Sun Salutations Yoga [I usually do 2 songs for timing]

Abs
Bosu Ball Crunches [50 reps]
Bosu Ball Plank with Knee Pulls [50 reps]
Bicycle Crunches [50 reps]

Day 4 – LEGS

Treadmill Cardio
10 minutes total [2 min walking fast (speed 4.0) / 6 min running (speed 6.0) / 2 min walking fast (speed 4.0)]

Strength Training Legs
Seated Calf Raises [3 sets at 20 reps each]
Leg Press Machine [3 sets at 20 reps each]
Lunges with Dumbbell (add weight if you want) [3 sets at 20 reps each]

Abs
Bosu Ball Crunches [50 reps]
Bosu Ball Plank with Knee Pulls [50 reps]
Bicycle Crunches [50 reps]

Treadmill Cardio
10 minutes total [2 min walking fast (speed 4.0) / 8 min running (speed 6.0)]

Strength Training Legs
Seated Calf Raises [3 sets at 20 reps each]
Leg Presses Machine [3 sets at 20 reps each]
Lunges with Dumbbell (add weight if you want) [3 sets at 20 reps each]

Abs
Bosu Ball Crunches [50 reps]
Bosu Ball Plank with Knee Raises [50 reps]
Bicycle Crunches [50 reps]

Stretch Sun Salutations Yoga [I usually do 2 songs for timing]

Abs
Bosu Ball Crunches [50 reps]
Bosu Ball Plank with Knee Pulls [50 reps]
Bicycle Sit Ups [50 reps]

Research

From the website Pop Workouts I looked at many different routines and decided the Jessica Alba 3-2-1 Workout was the best routine for my level of endurance (or lack there of) and strength training goals.  BUT this workout lacked the proper ab emphasis needed to achieve those nice abs Britney rocked. Thanks to blog London Moore Beauty and her post on the Workout Routine from Britney Spears in her Prime, I can incorporate some ab routines that Britney might have used.

Here are links to the different exercises: Shoulder Press Machine, Bicep Curl Machine, Tricep Extension Machine, Lap Pull Down, Seated Calf Raises, Leg Press, Lunges with Dumbbell, Superman (Pilates), Back Extensions, Cable Seated Row, Bosu Ball Crunches, Bosu Ball Plank with Knee Pulls, Bicycle Crunches, and Sun Salutations.

I also played around with many different apps to discover the perfect companion for a workout.

App Rejects:

  1. BodBot was useful when you don’t have a routine, and I liked the interface… but did not like how you could not customize the workouts  yourself.
  2. Bodybuilder.com was recommended by a friend who is doing a routine. The BodySpace portion seemed like a good fit and I even inputted the entire workout and created a new workout routine (you can link to it here if you want). The first day in the gym I tired to use it and it was AWFUL to navigate on my phone and track the workout in real time. I eventually got so fed I deleted the app. I did like how you could create a profile and track your weight, BMI, and photos, but I hated that it was a public profile! I dont want to share that with people (excuse me… that is personal). I am sorry, but that is not motivating for me.
  3. Fitness Buddy FREE was a hopeful contender, but in the end the free version was just not good enough for me.  I like the calender aspect and the navigability, but if you are looking for a free version this one only allows you to save 2 workouts.
  4. GymPact is a really cool idea for a workout app… it pays you to workout, and if you don’t workout on your committed days you have to pay THEM. I did a free trial and found the anxiety too intense. If you do work out it pays you like $.10 and if you don’t you pay $5 a day. Also, you can’t track a workout routine.  It is just to check into the gym while you are there.

App Winners:

  1. Gym Geek won in the end! It allows you to create your own workouts and track in real time. It took some time to set up, but while I did the workout it prompted me to move forward to the next set which was fun. It also gave me a star when I completed a workout set. I am a sucker for little rewards like gold stars so… this won my heart.
  2. Daily Ab Workout is a great app for different sit-up routines! It has a video that goes along the entire time you are doing it, allows you to play music while crunching, and has many different routines to choose from. I won’t be using it from now on my workout days, but I did use it for about a year and even paid the $.99 for the paid version! This goes to show how awesome this app is.

Current Workout Experience

I am currently on day 3 of this routine and it is incredibly LONG… I have had to cut it a bit short to not spend my life at the fucking gym.  However, maybe as I learn where the machines are and get comfortable with the routine it will shorten a bit. Overall I am sore, but not feeling TOO sore like I over did it. I did up the weight on the calf raises and did only 10 reps because I want to build bigger calves rather than lean calves. I also started the crunches with a goal of 40 (rather than 50) and plan to work up to 50 by next week.  My advice on the weight to use for strength training: I have no idea. When I started researching for workout routines I was all, “How the hell am I suppose to know how much weight to use?!?! Someone direct me!” The first day on the routine I tried different weights until I found one that burned but didn’t hurt. I think it is just trial and error.

I took a “before” picture the first workout day but I refuse to post it until I have made some actual progress.  Maybe I will take a week-by-week photo and post it when I am feeling Britney + Jessica fab 🙂

love, Sarah